Laughter is the Best Medicine

Joke of the Day

How Many Deists? 

Imam Mahdi Funny: Hey, Mahahaharaj.

Swami Mahahaharaj: Yes?

Imam Mahdi Funny: How many deists does it take to change a light bulb?

Swami Mahahaharaj: Hmm...I'm not sure. How many deists does it take to change a light bulb?

Swami Mahahaharaj: None. If the light bulb no longer interferes with the world, why bother interfering with the light bulb?

The Best Zen Teacher

Who is the best Zen teacher?

M.T. Ness

A Yogi Walked into a Pizza Parlor…

What did the Yogi say when he walked into the Zen Pizza Parlor?

"Make me one with everything."

When the Yogi got the pizza, he gave the proprietor a $20 bill. The proprietor pocketed the bill. The Yogi said "Don't I get change?"

The proprietor said, "Change must come from within."

God is Watching

Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, "Take only one, God is watching."

At the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. Moving through the line a boy wrote another note to leave by the cookies, "Take all you want, God is watching the apples."

The Buddhist Hotdog Vendor

A Buddhist approaches a hotdog vendor and says: "Make me one with everything."

He gives the vendor a $20 bill and waits. Finally he says: "Where's my change?"

Says the vendor: "All change must come from within."

Improvements in Hell

An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After awhile, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him.

One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"

Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God was surprised, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here."

"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I'm keeping him."

God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"

Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

Letters from Little Boys to God

Dear God,
Why is Sunday School on Sunday? I thought it was supposed to be our day of rest.
Tom L.

Dear God,
I went to this wedding on Sunday and they kissed right in the church! Is that O.K.?
Neil

Dear God,
If you watch me in church on Sunday, I'll show you my new shoes.
Mickey D.

Dear God,
Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up.
Bruce

Dear God,
If you give me a genie lamp like in Aladdin, I will give you anything you want, except my money or my chess set.
Raphael

Dear God,
Please put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now.
Greg

Dear God,
Please send Dennis Clark to another camp this summer.
Peter

Dear God,
You don't have to worry about me. I look both ways.
Dean

Dear God,
Are you really invisible or is that just a trick?
Doug

Dear God,
I want to be just like my Daddy when I get big but not with so much hair.
Sam

Dear God,
I am American. What are you?
Robert

Dear God,
If you didn't let the dinosaur become extinct, we wouldn't have this country. You did the right thing.
Jonathan

Dear God,
Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother.
Larry

Dear God,
I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know that I am not saying that because you are God already.
Charles

Dear God,
I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Thursday. That was cool!
Eugene

Jesus Is Watching You!

There was a burglar who broke into a home and started to gather the items he wanted to take. All of a sudden he heard, "Jesus is watching you!" He didn't see anything in the dark house, so he went on with what he was doing.

He heard, "Jesus is watching you!" again and then he really wondered who wassaying that. He turned on the flashlight, scanned the room, and finally saw a parrot.

"Did you say that?" asked the burgler.

"Yes," replied the parrot.

"By the way, what's your name?" the burgler inquired."Moses," answered the parrot.

"That's a strange name for a parrot. Who named you that?"

"The same people who named their rotweiller Jesus!"
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